Posted by: Anna | March 10, 2010

My name is Anna, and I’m in a mom group

One of the things that happened to me while I became a mom was I became a lonely mom.  Now, I’m not talking about being a single person, I am talking about a mom without friends to share stories with and things in common.  My friends who had kids my son’s age are all in California.  So although we could call each other, sometimes it was difficult.  I needed to go for a walk, meet for a cup of water or whatever! And I seriously lacked that.  My days consisted of working, coming home to my wonderful son and devoting all my time to my wonderful son.  And although I had my parents has an amazing support group, it’s not the same.

The amazing thing about my situation was JB; Joey’s dad encouraged me to join a mom group.  JB would come at least once a week so I can share all my stories and we would go for walks while I was trying to lose the baby weight and let go of my baby blues. To me, one of the saddest phases in my life was when I didn’t have girlfriends.  I remember back in college I was dating a guy and we went to Starbucks before a movie.  We sat there and we were talking, across from us was a huge group of girls laughing.  I have no idea why, but I just started crying and we had to leave.  I explained that although I was happy to be with him, I was alone.  I didn’t do things for me, and I wasn’t happy.  I couldn’t share myself with just a man because the “me” part was missing.  I missed my friends dearly and two weeks after I took a flight to LA to visit the friends.

When I had Joey I couldn’t just jump on a plane and leave.  I wanted a friend without feeling left out.  I wanted to laugh and share the ridiculous mom stories that we all eventually have.  But I had no one to share them with them.  So after crying again, JB said, go find a mom group.  It will all get better.  So I did, and I found a great mom group.  I can honestly say that I am happy and feel almost saved because I have women who are truly my friends, who are genuine, happy and we have all been there.  There is no chattiness but all supportiveness and I can’t tell you how happy my heart burst when I think about how lucky I am.  I know, this sounds cheesy with a capital C, but I learned that if mommy isn’t happy, no one is happy.  So thank God Joe pushed me to make friends.  If anything I have an extended support group that is fabulous.  Seriously, if you are a mom right now and feel like you need a friend, find a mom group.  It totally changed my life.  I have formed great friendships because sometimes you have to grow out of your old friendships and grow into your new ones.

And some of the perks include, having the babies go to bed at the same time and drinking late on a ‘school night.’

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Responses

  1. Your honesty never ceases to amaze me and one of things I love most dearly about you. You are inspiring and a blessing to all those who cannot express the real emotion that comes with life.
    You always have a GF in Chi-Town and in my heart.


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