Posted by: Anna | January 26, 2010

Sometimes I am Sarcastic, Sometimes

I am currently in the middle of a long thought process to revamp my blog and put my ideas into someone’s hands who is going to rock it.

But of course, my life is never “focused on one thing”.  I tend to over exert myself accidentally because I am so driven and think that I am capable of working, cooking, cleaning and spending all my time with Joey.  Because seriously, the best thing to do here would be to have a clone of myself, or a hotter version like Jennifer Lopez replace the cleaning and cooking part, so I can be creative with the love of my life, Joey.

Joey has been having fevers, again.  And I say that so dreading the replication that happened last year, when we visited the doctors twice a week for about two months so he can finally be diagnosed with Bronchiolitis then fuckin Asthma.  And I know you are probably all offended that I said fuckin Asthma, but I hate the bitch.

As much as I try to control my son’s asthma, it lingers. I have to change his diet, be very strict and yell at people about what he cannot eat.  I mean yell, because when someone challenges me when it comes to Joey, it pisses me off. Like I thought of this all by myself.  No, buddy. I worked with doctors, brilliant doctors who told me what I needed to do and why, and what was causing, and because I have the power to reduce the things that cause the asthma Joey is pretty much under control.

I can’t control the weather. The cold weather is hard on Joey, and I just realized this because every time it’s cold, there we go to sleep deprivation mode so I can make sure my little muchchin sleeps.

So as I have all of these amazing things on my mind, my son comes first and I am maybe, probably a very good chance on a meltdown.  And here’s the kicker for me, every woman who is on the verge of a meltdown says, “Oh, I was so stressed I lost five or ten lbs in one week.” (Insert sad face here). (Insert my WTF sarcastic face here). Because I have NEVER lost weight do to a melt down or stress. And believe me, if anyone has gone through life altering disappointments and heartache, it’s me. And I never lose weight.  Indeed, I Anna, gain weight. I am searching for fried food or I secretly binge on Taco Bell, because what is better tasting than fake meat with fake melted cheese sauce? NOTHING.

So I do really think that my clone that will look like Jennifer Lopez instead of me is due. Tonight, so she and I can stay up all night together, watching Joey sleep and balancing stuff on her booty. Now that will be fun.


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